Kim Kardashian couldn’t break the Internet – but Al Roker came close

Everybody needs a goal. Lose 10 pounds. Retire at 35. Survive the work week. Goal-ish kinda things.

Breaking the Internet is like that. Sort of. Except when it is Kim Kardashian. images

This was a publicity stunt for a mag oh-so-cleverly called Paper. Together the relatively unknown magazine and 34 year old Ms. Kardashian hoped to break the internet this week. Sigh.

More than two billion peeps world wide use the internet every day. Now most of them are wishing they hadn’t “clicked here” when tempted with the bare bottomed pic of Kim.

If breaking the internet is a thing, the Kardashian heinie came pretty darn close to working. How sad is that? Millions and millions of internet users couldn’t look away fast enough. And it’s hard to unsee something like that.

Not going to post it here…you really don’t want to see it.  And if you do wanna see it, well you already have.

No worries though. Paper wasn’t just about the pics. Oh no.  They had great interviews too:

This issue is a COLLECTORS ITEM! Pairing Kim Kardashian with the legendary photographer Jean-Paul Goude was the kickoff. Like it or not, Kardashian is a Hyper-Pop-Culture-Icon-Institution. She understands fame and popularity as if it were coded in her DNA. Goude popped the cork on what makes her an icon: it is not just her ass, but her willingness to give us 100 percent.

Yeah that happened. Kim gave all of us 100 percent.

Never one to let a moment of  pub go undocumented Kardashian also tweeted the images of herself with her own amusing message,

“And they say I didn’t have a talent…try balancing a champagne glass on your ass LOL.”

The web was invented when Kimye was 9 years old (that’s 25 years ago for you non-mathletes) and it’s creators didn’t dream of reality tv, selfies, or frankly Kim Kardashian. Apparently her skill involves oil and some surgery. Stay classy Kim.

Just when you thought it was safe to open your browser on Thursday the mag released a full frontal nudie pic.

Funny thing on the way to breaking the internet though, instead of more endless faux celeb Kim traffic, the totally uncool Al Roker’s record breaking looooooooooong weathercast had the twitter verse goin all #Rokerthon.

The “Today Show” weather institution finished his 34-hour broadcast a few minutes after 8 on Friday morning, putting him in line for a Guinness world record and making “Rokerthon” the hottest trending topic on Twitter.

You go Al.

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